No. I did not spend this weekend playing would-be entertaining adolescent games with a group of drunken friends. Quite the contrary, I went home with the plan to try and behave in as adult way as possible. So why did I choose such a confusing headline for my entry again?
Well, first of all, it is a good eye-catcher, isn’t it (wish I could include it in my essay somehow, I really do); usually nobody is interested in reading about housework, but everyone would read anything that seems to be-even distantly- connected to something erotic:), but the main and serious reason is that "Spin the bottle" or "Truth or Dare" are the closest possible names for our variety of this game, known in our country under the less attractive name of "Do you mind or not?" which is a literal translation of the question you ask the other players throughout the game before making them do/answer something unpleasant. And as my weekend plans went upside down the moment I unlocked the main door on Friday evening, as if someone did actually spin the bottle; as lots of things that have happened since that time made me think about what "truth" and "dare" were; and as I had to do a lot of "I don’t mind" practice, I found the title quite appropriate.
After quite a tiring Friday spent with a huge backpack on my back, traveling through the city in traffic jams and trying to solve as many issues as possible, in spite of all slippery surfaces and angry people I finally got through a terrible half-snow, half-rain curtain to our block of flats.
I was looking forward to unpacking my things, giving some presents to my father for his nameday, having a warm shower (no, I did not have one the day before, the blackout was even longer than I expected), working on my essay on sister’s laptop (as she was not supposed to be at home this weekend) and going to an early sleep to be prepared to help my mother with moving the heavy things from the garage the next day as I had promised. But when I came home, there was a nasty argument between my mother and my sister,who were shouting terrible and painful things at each other, including mentioning leaving home forever, being irresponsible and selfish, becoming a premature parent and so on. It was painful for me twice, as usually it is me who gets cross with my mother and have a big argument due to a mere misunderstanding, and I know how painful that is well enough. But seeing it from the "third person" position was even worse, as I was once again reminded of
how easily two people with good intentions, who actually love each other can hurt each other by trying to "help" the other one as they think they know what is best for him/her better than they do themselves. In this case it was the fact that sister was obviously ill (coughing terribly and having red eyes) and still wanted to go out for the weekend as planned. From mother’s point of view, it was very selfish, as sister only wanted to have her fun at any cost, returning in a few days even more ill, with the consequence of her staying in bed for a longer time and causing more problems that could have fatal impact on both her studies and the rest of the family.
From sister’s point of view, getting out of the flat despite of her feeling feeble was a noble sacrifice, as she did not want to bother mother and infect father or me. And this insolvable "chivalry" from both of them ended in my sister’s crying and coughing most of the night and my not getting a proper sleep and feeling dizzy.
Of course, sister stayed at home eventually, and I am therefore not allowed to enter her room and have to share the other one (the only one there is left) with my parents, which makes even writing this blog entry almost a heroic act). If this was lat year, I would probably spent Saturday crying over my unlucky fate. But I decided to be an adult and not to forget that there are worse things in life than repeated unexpected illnesses and needless arguments and to play this "I don’t mind"game.
In the morning I realized that a few friends were sending me messages (mostly inviting me to some parties) and that my battery was almost empty and that I have left my charger at the dormitories because of the blackout and that my sister gave the spare charger to my cousin whose cell phone was stolen and that the nearest chance to charge my cell phone will therefore be Tuesday evening unless I get up really really early on Monday and change my plans.
But I didn’t mind. At least I will have some peace of mind without the com-technologies.
Then I went to the garage with my mum and realized that the neighbour had thrown all the snow from "in front of his garage" to "in front of our garage", so I did some exercise with a shovel, too, but in a more considerate way.
And I didn’t mind, thinking, "At least I will have some physical exercise"
Then we spent one and a half hour carrying heavy wooden and metal...things... up the slippery stairs to the entrance to the basement.
And I didn’t mind, as it was further strengthening my non-existing muscles.
Then we had to put these things to the basement which is a very dark and narrow cage in a dark and dusty place full of different wires, fungi and conduits, not to mention the dark blue floors and the rolling press which had been making me nervous ever since my sister read Stephen King to me.
But I almost didn’t mind. I have discovered that the years spent at the dormitories weren’t a complete waste of time even if I am expelled now. My claustrophobia has definitely become less intensive at least in some ways.
Then I was told to carry the rest of the (heavy) things to my granny who lives on the tenth floor.
And I did mind a lot and I was a coward and rang the bell and asked granny to come down by their terrible lift as I had shown enough courage in the basement and was getting really exhausted. And then I went up with her (by the lift) and stayed until sunset and then I went home and met a former flute teacher of mine and was ashamed not to go to the lift with him and he was joking about the lift being broken all the way up and then he got off and I had to continue alone and
I did mind, but I managed.
So now I am at home, sister is sleeping, my mother and father are in the kitchen and I sneaked to the computer to write this entry to remind myself not to mind anything even tomorrow, when more moving and washing and ironing clothes and packing and not having a rest is on the schedule. My back hurts and I don’t mind. My legs hurt and I don’t mind. But I have spent half an hour writing this instead of writing my essay and I really SHOULD mind.
Ok,
spin the bottle, pick the victim...
